How far will your sight take you?
Are they able to see through your blinding mask?
No one bothers to ask... No one seems to care... as long as they see you happy, strong and outgoing they wouldn't mind. Sometimes it feels much better if behind all your laughter someone will ask you "are you really okay?". One morning your eyes opened and suddenly your heart felt cold. The warmth, the fire that keeps you alive went out.
You hear your master's voice but you hide yourself because of your shameful face. You can really use a shoulder to pour your heart out right now, unfortunately, no one's there. No one seem to mind at all. It's either they don't care or they don't really know... come on, you're wearing your mask remember?
You can taste your soul long and hunger for your first love... but...
Face the fact!
You can't live all by yourself
This life is not meant to be played individually
Don't depart from the vine!
and lastly...
You can't survive without Him.
Pretense.
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It's that choice.
If mind is always over matter, is the mind powerful enough to control the heart?
The bottom line of the situation has always been obvious; the person you love doesn't love you anymore. They say that people always have a choice, a choice whether to be happy or to stay in agony. This might sound weird but have you ever experienced wanting to banish the feelings but then there's something in you that you can't explain and this 'something' stops you from totally letting go? A certain "something" that keeps on pulling your leg, hinders you from being free and stops you from being happy.
You always lie to yourself saying: "I'm ok, she's out of my life" but when your music airs, there seems to be an invisible, invulnerable knife stabbing your heart. How you'd wish that you're numb! You can't deny the fact that you're still affected and that your heart has never been healed completely. When you see lovers enjoying the breeze of Christmas, when you see shimmering lights everywhere, tears begin to fall from your eyes unexpectedly. Come on! you can't even quit yourself from texting her. When she sends a reply, your heart jumps in anticipation! The cup of your heart just overflows with so much aching.
I remember reading Neru's blog and the thought that was embossed in my mind was, "why insist, why persist, when you have alternatives" Well... though there are "alternatives" they may not be as good as the one we desire.
"What is wrong with me?!"
"Why can't I stop this?"
"How long will I wait?!"
Answer? You can!
You just don't want to
You just won't accept the fact.
Remember when you were just a little boy and was given a taste of your first antibiotic? How about your first biogesic(did I spell it right)? It was awful right? the taste? By the time you attempted to swallow it, you spitted it out! Surprisingly, several months have passed and you've been able to get used to it. For a little kid it was an achievement!
It's when you've decided to endure the awful taste to once and for all END intensifying pain.
The bottom line of the situation has always been obvious; the person you love doesn't love you anymore. They say that people always have a choice, a choice whether to be happy or to stay in agony. This might sound weird but have you ever experienced wanting to banish the feelings but then there's something in you that you can't explain and this 'something' stops you from totally letting go? A certain "something" that keeps on pulling your leg, hinders you from being free and stops you from being happy.
You always lie to yourself saying: "I'm ok, she's out of my life" but when your music airs, there seems to be an invisible, invulnerable knife stabbing your heart. How you'd wish that you're numb! You can't deny the fact that you're still affected and that your heart has never been healed completely. When you see lovers enjoying the breeze of Christmas, when you see shimmering lights everywhere, tears begin to fall from your eyes unexpectedly. Come on! you can't even quit yourself from texting her. When she sends a reply, your heart jumps in anticipation! The cup of your heart just overflows with so much aching.
I remember reading Neru's blog and the thought that was embossed in my mind was, "why insist, why persist, when you have alternatives" Well... though there are "alternatives" they may not be as good as the one we desire.
"What is wrong with me?!"
"Why can't I stop this?"
"How long will I wait?!"
Answer? You can!
You just don't want to
You just won't accept the fact.
Remember when you were just a little boy and was given a taste of your first antibiotic? How about your first biogesic(did I spell it right)? It was awful right? the taste? By the time you attempted to swallow it, you spitted it out! Surprisingly, several months have passed and you've been able to get used to it. For a little kid it was an achievement!
It's when you've decided to endure the awful taste to once and for all END intensifying pain.
Your average love life.
It was 2 years ago when I fell in love with my best friend. It was as wonderful as the sun's afterglow with the different colors of the spectrum, words would be inadequate to convey the beauty of the love we had. Surely the risk of having our friendship grow into something more was massive. People say that once the relationship has ended, it's difficult to bring the old times back.
Both of us weren't sure about how our relationship would end, we were just enjoying the cool breeze that encloses us, having love our warmth.
All my life, she's been nothing but the best.
Unfortunately, we broke up, it was because of some reason totally complicated to explain. I could say that breaking up with her would be one of the worst decisions I HAVE EVER MADE. Until now I never really moved on... always wishing that there will be a time when she'll be knocking at the door of my heart again.
We tried to be bestfriends again, calling each other "bez" and sharing details about our lives. She has her new boyfriend and I'm busy with the church's ministries. Though we still keep in touch (like 1 text message in a month) and do regular bestfriend routines, there's something in her or in me that invites an awkward feeling. I believe that there's no hope of having it fixed. Sadly, I have to accept the fact that I lost her.
It think it's deja vu because the same situation seems to occur. I'm scared and bothered because I'm afraid to lose a precious person in my life. *sighs
Having one's friendship grow into something more sure is risky. You should keep on thinking and praying about it because if you push it further you might not be able to handle the consequences.
Are you willing to lose the friendship for the love?
Both of us weren't sure about how our relationship would end, we were just enjoying the cool breeze that encloses us, having love our warmth.
All my life, she's been nothing but the best.
Unfortunately, we broke up, it was because of some reason totally complicated to explain. I could say that breaking up with her would be one of the worst decisions I HAVE EVER MADE. Until now I never really moved on... always wishing that there will be a time when she'll be knocking at the door of my heart again.
We tried to be bestfriends again, calling each other "bez" and sharing details about our lives. She has her new boyfriend and I'm busy with the church's ministries. Though we still keep in touch (like 1 text message in a month) and do regular bestfriend routines, there's something in her or in me that invites an awkward feeling. I believe that there's no hope of having it fixed. Sadly, I have to accept the fact that I lost her.
It think it's deja vu because the same situation seems to occur. I'm scared and bothered because I'm afraid to lose a precious person in my life. *sighs
Having one's friendship grow into something more sure is risky. You should keep on thinking and praying about it because if you push it further you might not be able to handle the consequences.
Are you willing to lose the friendship for the love?
Steering Wheel
God promised to be our greatest provider but sometimes, when people are totally out of cash, they find it difficult to TOTALLY depend on God.
Well, frankly speaking, for other people, it is really difficult to put their trust on a spirit who though promises overflowing blessings still is invisible. If your prayer request doesn't come on time, you become impatient and instead of letting God handle the situation, you begin to take over. Though he told you to quit worrying, day and night you still think of ways of obtaining revenue. You keep on saying: "God, I love you, I trust you" but when the problem strikes, "Lord, hold on a sec, I think I know how to fix it."
When the moon and the stars are up you'll pray: "Lord, please help me, I trust in you" but when the sun shines you'll say: "Lord, I'm feeling strong, I think I can take it from here."
Sometimes, when people aren't deeply inclined to God's word, they tend to take diverse paths. Some will choose immoral ways just to earn money and though the Holy Spirit convicts them, they'll choose not to dwell in it. It's like saying: "Come on, just let me pay my debts and I'll be back at you!"
People fail to realize that God too has emotions. God is always willing and able to help us. Even if we say to him "I trust you" yet is opposite to what we act, it hurts God. I mean, come on, the heart weighs more than the words we utter. Now, when people choose wrong ways of gaining money, it's sin and it automatically separates them from God's love. What hurts in that situation is that though conviction is upon them, they would rather choose money in the expense of God. An object in exchange for God's love? Now go ahead, say "Ouch"
God doesn't always answer prayers. When He says no, it means that He has something better for us because for Him, we deserve nothing but the best. Well, frankly speaking, for other people, it is really difficult to put their trust on a spirit who though promises overflowing blessings still is invisible. If your prayer request doesn't come on time, you become impatient and instead of letting God handle the situation, you begin to take over. Though he told you to quit worrying, day and night you still think of ways of obtaining revenue. You keep on saying: "God, I love you, I trust you" but when the problem strikes, "Lord, hold on a sec, I think I know how to fix it."
When the moon and the stars are up you'll pray: "Lord, please help me, I trust in you" but when the sun shines you'll say: "Lord, I'm feeling strong, I think I can take it from here."
Sometimes, when people aren't deeply inclined to God's word, they tend to take diverse paths. Some will choose immoral ways just to earn money and though the Holy Spirit convicts them, they'll choose not to dwell in it. It's like saying: "Come on, just let me pay my debts and I'll be back at you!"
People fail to realize that God too has emotions. God is always willing and able to help us. Even if we say to him "I trust you" yet is opposite to what we act, it hurts God. I mean, come on, the heart weighs more than the words we utter. Now, when people choose wrong ways of gaining money, it's sin and it automatically separates them from God's love. What hurts in that situation is that though conviction is upon them, they would rather choose money in the expense of God. An object in exchange for God's love? Now go ahead, say "Ouch"
God is never in a hurry, but He's always on time.
MEMOIRS.
I cleaned my closet this afternoon and saw this poem given to me by a very special person. It seems like it was last summer... a summer morning with the bright sun and various smiles on faces. Everything was just like yesterday. 
I guess it's inevitable to have regrets. Letting her go seems to be one of the awful mistakes I have made. Memories are memories, you can have them as long as you'd like, but bear in mind that no matter how long you hold on, there will come a time when the only option left is to let go.
More than wonderful
"The Lord is close to the brokenhearted and saves those who are crushed in the spirit."
-Psalms 34:18
-Psalms 34:18
When you're in distress, you seek comfort from your friends. You text them, you call them, you try to use every medium of communication simply to share them your burdens. When they don't return your calls or give you answers you don't want to hear, you harbor bitterness in your heart. When their ears and hearts aren't around you, you pity and condemn yourself.
We often forget the comfort and joy the one above can give us. We reason out "mas maganda pag friends dahil nakikita mo" but the peace God offers is far more different and far more wonderful than the laughter friends can give us. Another reason why unbelievers doubt his presence is because they never tried it.
I can say that the bible is like a compliation of God's promises just like the scripture quoted above. God is a God who never breaks his promise. What he said, he does, what he promised, he fulfills. When he said he'll comfort you... he really means it.
We often forget the comfort and joy the one above can give us. We reason out "mas maganda pag friends dahil nakikita mo" but the peace God offers is far more different and far more wonderful than the laughter friends can give us. Another reason why unbelievers doubt his presence is because they never tried it.
I can say that the bible is like a compliation of God's promises just like the scripture quoted above. God is a God who never breaks his promise. What he said, he does, what he promised, he fulfills. When he said he'll comfort you... he really means it.
ONE MISSED CALL (horror movie?).. thoughts of a struggling individual.
I was browsing the text messages in my cellphone this morning and I saw so many things that gave me the reason to cry. Awwww..Cellphones are really handy. I mean, you can text and call people, you can make them feel comfortable when they're all by themselves and most importantly you can share the gospel through this piece of tech. In fact, manufacturers have already developed more function and features for cellular phones. Functions may vary depending upon the user's "trip". There are games, music stores, chat boxes, emails and many more. But who would have thought that this work of science can be a torturing machine?
Yes, it can bring us pain! It's like when you broke up with your girlfriend, moved on, browsed your phone and again felt the agony of yesterday. All those sweet words that once made your heart melt are now breaking it again. You stare at the ceiling and thou
ght: "why am I hurting myself?" you attempted to delete everything but you failed 'coz those are the only memories left. All of a sudden you feel like all the love you have for her that once was lost, is now regenerating. How you wish you can slap all the messages on her face... "Don't you remember any of this?" you wished such because you're hoping that she would care. You're hoping that everything would be back to the way it was before. You kept on browsing the messages, from those tasty, sugar-coated phrases down to the ones where the fight started.As you peruse the messages you begin to wonder "who started it? was it completely my fault? what must I do to fix this" In tears, you saw your pride conceiving anger and gave birth to something more
. You're confused and decided not to remove your grip on your stubborn pride. You knew that it took him so much sincerity and courage to apologize yet you ignored that. "Sorry, that's it?" came out from you...
You saw your fault; you were shocked to see your comrade fleeing from you.
The tables have turned, now, it's YOU who's asking for forgiveness. "What did I do to deserve this?" you uttered. Someone came to the picture and said: "let go, it's not worth it", "NO!! I promised God not to give up" you replied. You kept your mouth shut for 24 hours and began to fix the mess.
. You're confused and decided not to remove your grip on your stubborn pride. You knew that it took him so much sincerity and courage to apologize yet you ignored that. "Sorry, that's it?" came out from you...You saw your fault; you were shocked to see your comrade fleeing from you.
The tables have turned, now, it's YOU who's asking for forgiveness. "What did I do to deserve this?" you uttered. Someone came to the picture and said: "let go, it's not worth it", "NO!! I promised God not to give up" you replied. You kept your mouth shut for 24 hours and began to fix the mess.
It was too late! or is it? you have no idea about it being fixed. You also came to the point where you had no choice but to give up.
After reading, a ball fell on your head and the ball seemed to wake you up. You find yourself laughing... "why am I being bothered by this? I already moved on right? haha"
These kind text messages that are associated with painful memories can simply be one heck of a tool for making us cry. Of course, deleting and completely moving on from the incident depends on the person. Some people are just fond of resenting and likes getting hurt for the ones they love. (guilty!)
After reading, a ball fell on your head and the ball seemed to wake you up. You find yourself laughing... "why am I being bothered by this? I already moved on right? haha"
These kind text messages that are associated with painful memories can simply be one heck of a tool for making us cry. Of course, deleting and completely moving on from the incident depends on the person. Some people are just fond of resenting and likes getting hurt for the ones they love. (guilty!)
Moving on (which includes the deletion of messages) is a choice. The one who left you didn't take that freedom you have. You can always choose to forget about all the painful past. Yes, it's difficult but eventually TIME HEALS EVERYTHING... seriously! You know the reason why it seems so slow for your wound to heal is because you're still scratching it. Leave it alone! focus on other things. Be happy.
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