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Showing posts with label Dirty SMS in Hindi. Show all posts
Showing posts with label Dirty SMS in Hindi. Show all posts

Gand Me Ungli????

Posted by Jublang | Labels: , , , , , , , ,

Jab Santa Fauj Mein Tha To Uso Sharat Laganey Ki Bahut Buri Aadat Thi Aur Sabhi Us Se Preshan Rehte The.

Ek Din Santa Major Ke Pass Gaya Aur Bola -

Santa : "Sir, Yeh Meri Aakhiri Sharat Hai, Aur Woh Main Aapke Sath Lagana Chahta Hun."

Major Khishi- Khushi Raji Ho Gaya, aur Bola- 

Major : "Bolo, Kya Sharat Hai?"

Santa : "Apko Bwaseer Hai".

Major : Main Sharat Lagata Hun Ke Nahi Hai".

Santa : "Main Ungli Daal Kar Check Karuga".

Major Khushi-Khushi Maan Gaya Aur Dono Me 5,000/- Rs. Ki Sharat Lag Gayi.

Santa Ne Major Ki "GAAND ME UNGLI" Daal Di.

Tabhi Bahar Se Jor Jor Se Rone Ki Aawaz Aane Lagi.

Major Pant Pehan Kar Bahar Gaya Aur Poocha-

Major : "Kya Hua?"

Staff : "Sir, Isne Humse 50,000/- Rs. Ki Sharat Lagai Thi Ki Major Ki Gaand Me Ungli Daal Ke Dikhaunga!"

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Posted by Jublang

Non Veg Joke of the Day........

Posted by Jublang | Labels: , , , , , , , , , ,


A lady made an advertisment in newspaper,-

"I want a man to be my partner..
Conditions 3..
1. He will not beat me,
2. He will not run away.
3 and most important.- He will have to satistfy me in beds,whenever i want.
10 inch will be good enough"


After some hour her door bell rang.
She opened door and saw a man on wheelchair who doesnt even have hands and forearms..

Lady- who are u?
Man- I was in army and lost my hands and one leg in battle..
Anyways i am here regarding your advertisement..
Lady- How can you fit in my conditions?
Man- Look i dont have hands and forearms, so i can't beat you...
I am not on my legs, so i can't run away..
Lady- Ok, but what about the 3rd condition? How wil u satistfy me? Do u have 10 inch big?
Man- What the hell with women's mind, can't you women use ur brain.
What the fuck you think, "That HOW THAT DOOR BELL RANG.."

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Posted by Jublang

Bechara Ladkaaaaaaaaaaaa

Posted by Jublang | Labels: , , , , , , , ,


There was a guy who had been having chronic trouble in trying to get an erection. After weeks of frustration, he finally breaks down and goes to the doctor. The doctor gives him a thorough examination and finally makes the diagnosis.
"Well, there's good news and there's bad news," she says. "The bad news is that the muscles aroundyour penis are deteriorating, and there is no cure."
The guy, on the verge of panic, finally regains his composure.
"So what's the good news?" he asks.
The doctor says, "There is an experimental treatment available, but there are no guarantees. It involves transplanting the muscles from a baby elephant's trunk into your penis. Would you like to try it?"
The guy thinks about it and finally says, "Well, the thought of going through life without being able to have sex is just too much for me. What have I got to lose? Let's do it."
So the doctor performs the operation.
A few weeks later, the guy takes hisgirlfriend out to a nice restaurant to celebrate his new equipment. Whilesitting at the table, he feels a stirring between his legs; it gets progressively worse until it reaches the point of being painful.
Seeking relief, he reaches down andunzips his fly to relieve some of the pressure.
Suddenly, his penis leaps free from his pants, slides over the tabletop and grabs a dinner roll, then returns to his pants again.
"Wow!" says his stunned girlfriend,"That was impressive! Can you do that again?"
Eyes watering and face flushed, he says, "Probably...But I don't know if Ican fit another dinner roll up my ass!"

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Name in English

Posted by Jublang | Labels: , , , , , , , , , , ,

man goes for a job interview.

Interviewer : "Can you please write your name for me in English,

here on this paper"

The man writes his name and passes the piece of paper back to the

interviewer.

Interviewer : "Are you sure this is your name?"


Man : "Of course I am sure that this is my name"

Interviewer " So your name is....PRETTY RED KNICKERS?"

Man : "Well sir, you told me to write my name in English, but in

Punjabi my name is SUNDAR LAL CHADHA."

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Posted by Jublang

Joke of the DAY!!!

Posted by Jublang | Labels: , , , , , , , , ,

College Wali MASALEDAR....
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Office Wali FIKKI.....
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Ghar Wali Me TASTE NAHI AATA......
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Hotel Wali To MAST Hoti Hai.....
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Sudhar Jao KAMINO!!!
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Mai Chaye (TEA) Ki Baat Kar Raha Hu......

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Boobbbbbbbbbbbbbbssssssssss

Posted by Jublang | Labels: , , , , , ,

Sante Ne Bante Se Pucha: “Oye, Tune Kabhi Life Mein Kisi Aurat Ke Boobs Choose Hai?”
Banta: “Nahi Yaar, Kabhi Moka Nahi Laga”
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Santa: “To Bhonsdi Ke Kya Tu Apne Baap Ke Tatte Choos Ke Bada Hua Hai?“

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Naari Shakti

Posted by Jublang | Labels: , , , , , , , , , ,

Que: Naari Ka Matlab Kya Hota Hai ???

Ans.: Naari Ka Matlab Hai "Shakti".

Que.: To Phir.... Purash Ka Matlab Kya Hota Hai ???

 Ans.: Very Simple.....
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Purash Ka Matlab Hota Hai...........
 
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. "Sehan Shakti"

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Posted by Jublang

Lady & Baba Ji

Posted by Jublang | Labels: , , , , , ,

Lady to Baba Ji - Maharaj Mere Santan Nahi Ho Rahi!!

Baba Ji -  Panty Koun Se Colour Ki Pehnti Ho?

Lady - Red Colour Ki.

Baba Ji - Panty GREEN Colour ki Pehna Karo, Signal "ON" Rahega Tabhi Santan Hogi.

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Posted by Jublang

SEXY SHAMPOOS

Posted by Jublang | Labels: , , , , , ,

Lady (to Shopkeeper) - 1 Shampoo Plz...

Shopkeeper - Koun Sa???
Agar HEAD k Baal Dhone Hai To "HEAD N SHOULDER".
Agar PANTY ke Baal Dhone Hai To " PANTENE" Le Lo...

Lady - "GARNIER" De Do - Gaand Dhoni Hai....

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Posted by Jublang

Punjabi Adult Joke - Ladka Ladki Ki Tarkrar

Posted by Jublang | Labels: , , , , , , , , , ,

Ladki (Ladke Se) - Main tenu chhad ke ja rahi aa...! 
                                 Menu Bhool Jai...!!

Ladka -  Na Tere Aane Ki Khusi, 
              Na Tere Jane Ka Gum....


             Fuddi Teri Le Lai,
             Dafa Ho Teri Bhen Di Lun.....

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Posted by Jublang

Dirty Joke of the Day - 2

Posted by Jublang | Labels: , , , , , , ,

Ek aadmi govt job ke liye interview dene gaya. Interviewer -
Aapki koi majburi to nahi?
Aadmi:- ji sir, asal me pehle main fauj me tha, jung ke dauraan
meri taango ke darmiyaan ek bomb phata aur mere TATTE ud gaye.!
Interviewer:- Ye to koi problem nahi...Monday se aap join kare.
Hum sab 9 baje aate hai, aap 11 baje aana.
Aadmi:-aisa kyun?
Interviewer:- Hum sab 11 baje tak kuch nahi karte,
bas TATTE khujlate rehte hai

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Posted by Jublang

Dirty Joke of the Day - 1

Posted by Jublang | Labels: , , , , , , ,


Jab Se Mardo Ko Aapas Mein Pyar Karne Ki Permission Mili Hai, 
Tab Se Tailor Log Ek Naya Sawal Karne Lage Hai. 
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Sir, Aapki Pant Mein Zip Aage Lagani Hai Ya Peeche?

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Posted by Jublang

Adult Joke of The Day - Mufat Ka Maal

Posted by Jublang | Labels: , , , ,

Ek Din Santa Ki Girl Friend Preeto Ne Bade Romantic Mood Mein Santa Se Puchcha :-

Preeto : “Tum Mujhe Kitna Pyaar Karte Ho Ji?”

Santa : “Bahut Jyada”

Preeto : “Tum Mujhe Itna Pyaar Kyu Karte Ho Ji?”

Santa: “Free Di Fuddi Jo Leni Hai“

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